One in six couples will have a fertility issue at some point in their lives and one in 10 couples will have trouble conceiving their second child. You are not alone.
Don’t panic, your fertility journey doesn’t have to be an express service straight to IVF. Some simple changes can improve your chance of conceiving naturally.
Whether you're just starting out or you've been trying for a while, it's important to remember the emotions, worries and thoughts you are trying to deal with are valid and common. You are not alone.
The World Health Organisation predicts that infertility will be the third most serious health condition in the 21st Century
We're dedicated to helping you achieve your dream - having a baby. We offer a range of services - from counselling through to IVF & pre-implantation genetic diagnosis - all with the aim of easing your journey to successful pregnancy.
Are you a female struggling to conceive? Read through potential reasons why, or learn more about testing options.
With 40% of fertility issues being male related, it may be time to find out more.
Our intention, driven by 30 years of planning, compassion and research investment, is to put our words into action for you so that you can feel assured that there is no better care and no better chance of a healthy baby to be found. Anywhere.
Because of the care, technology and expertise we put into your care, you’ll have a better chance of taking home a baby.
Follow our exciting and informative Modern Babies series presented by Genea and NOVA Entertainment
At Genea we work with only the best specialists and science, resulting in leading success rates. Find the right specialist or the clinic that suits you today.
Established in February 2014, Genea Oxford Fertility offers Christchurch couples access to treatment options for all of their fertility needs.
It’s important to find the right specialist for you. Read the profiles of the Fertility Specialists here.
Infertility and its treatment can be a crisis in your life and deciding to seek help and start fertility treatment is an exciting but also scary process. It’s a cliché but you’re likely to experience a rollercoaster ride of emotions from anticipation and joy to disappointment and even grief.
To help you look after your emotional wellbeing alongside solving your medical infertility, Genea Oxford offers a counselling service through our specially trained infertility counsellors. We encourage you to see this service as an essential part of our care for you.
You can make an appointment to meet face to face, or our ANZICA Accredited counsellors can talk with you on the phone. There’s no charge for counselling during your treatment.
Counsellor visits are offered to patients as part of each fertility treatment cycle. For all counselling inquiries with Dr Lois Tonkin please call 0800 377 894 or 021 337 942 to reach her directly.
Get to know Lois below.
Lois has worked in private practice as a counsellor and counsellor trainer for around 25 years. She has a particular expertise in working with people dealing with various types of loss, and has published a number of books and resources about these issues. In her work at Genea Oxford she supports people to work through the fears, hopes and decisions that fertility treatment can entail.
In 2014 Lois received her PhD for her research into the experience of women who are 'circumstantially childless'. These are women who planned to have a child but have not done so for various reasons, and are coming to terms with the possibility that they might not be able to have their own biological child. Lois's study focussed on women's experiences as they explored and weighed up their options - such as fertility treatment - or found different ways to express the nurturing qualities of being a mother.
Lois draws on this research, and her long experience as a counsellor working with women and their partners who are dealing with fertility issues, in her work at Genea Oxford. She is recognised for her warm, relaxed style and her professional experience in counselling.
She sees clients at the Genea Oxford clinic on Peterborough Street. If you would like to talk about counselling with her, you can call her at 021 337 942 or ask your nurse or doctor to arrange for her to contact you.
To find out more about Lois, visit her webpage at loistonkin.com.
Ken Daniels is Adjunct Professor in the School of Social and Political Sciences at the University of Canterbury in Christchurch, New Zealand. He has worked in the field of assisted human reproduction for 40 years undertaking counselling, research and policy development in a number of countries. For 12 years he was Deputy Chair of the New Zealand Government Advisory Committee on Assisted Reproductive Technology.
He has published over 150 papers and chapters in books and is the author of the widely used book designed for parents and professionals - Building a Family with the Assistance of Donor Insemination. In 2014 he was appointed by the Queen to be an Officer of the New Zealand Order of Merit (ONZM) for his contribution to reproductive technology and mental health.
For all counselling inquiries please call us on 0800 377 894.
Some patients say they thought they’d be perceived negatively if they sought help, or that had to be very depressed before talking to a counsellor.
In fact, the reality is that you don’t need to be in an emotional crisis before you seek help and sometimes just being able to talk about your anxieties and feelings can help to normalise them. Many couples choose not to tell family and friends about their treatment which means you can feel quite isolated and alone.
You may discover that you were unprepared for the emotional upheaval infertility brings, and that dealing with disappointment and uncertainty leaves you feeling moody and fragile. While infertility is a medical condition, it can affect every part of your life, challenging the way you feel about yourself, your relationships with others and your self-esteem. You may feel anxious, irritable, angry, sad, isolated and guilty. You can feel a sense of loss of control over your life and your future. Your motivation and sense of purpose in life can be severely challenged, work can seem irrelevant, and slowly you may find yourself feeling consumed by the infertility treatment.
Our counsellors can help you sort through these feelings and identify coping strategies - either in individual or couples counselling sessions. They are also able to talk you through the specifics of your infertility treatment choices and the relevant social and emotional considerations.
We know that men and women cope very differently with their infertility.
For many couples, making the decision to start fertility treatment is not an easy one. It is not unusual for women to feel let down and angry with their bodies and/or for the partner who has been diagnosed with the infertility problem to feel ashamed and guilty.
Men seek understanding of their partner’s distress and ways of helping them. One of the more difficult challenges for men in dealing with infertility is the feeling of helplessness, the inability to fix the problem or make their partner feel better. Some women feel that whatever their partner does, it is not enough because he is not going through the physical side of treatment. Sometimes, talking about your expectations of each other can lead to more understanding and tolerance of your partner’s position.
Talking to someone who is skilled in these areas and knowledgeable about infertility treatment is a positive coping strategy.
Your Genea Oxford Counsellor will ask you about your background, your history of infertility, the effects of infertility on you and how you have managed the stresses of infertility to date. The kinds of issues, which often come up for couples include:
Infertility is often difficult to manage, and is exacerbated when it is prolonged, when there isn’t family or social support at hand, when there are other major stresses in your life, or when you have had other losses. The counsellor’s role is to provide a framework for you to explore your thoughts and feelings, to enhance your coping strategies, and to anticipate and assist in managing IVF treatment stresses.
If you need more info, have questions or just want some advice on your next steps feel free to ask me.
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